Parliament Expenses Scandal
I’m sad and ashamed to have to report that a scandal is rocking Shalampax’s parliament at this very moment.
A thorough government investigation has discovered that Brokentoaster, a backbench Member of Parliament, used his parliamentary office expense allowance to cover the cost of renovations to his personal apartment. It has been determined that he has charged almost $150,000 of such expenses to his office account since becoming a member of parliament a mere two years ago.
This despicable act on Brokentoaster’s part is unprecedented here in Shalampax. In the entire history of Shalampax’s parliament, with the exception of Brokentoaster, not a single Member of Parliament, not even the lowliest among them, has charged less than $250,000 worth of personal expenses to his or her office account in just the first six months of holding office. Once they get going, the two-year total is usually several times that.
Clearly, Brokentoaster is not making the necessary effort. It’s no wonder that he has never been allowed to advance out of the backbenches of parliament and into cabinet, where the true spoils are to be found.
As punishment for his laziness, parliament has voted to force Brokentoaster to serve an additional term in office when his current term ends.
Maybe he’ll do better the second time around. One can only hope. We do, after all, expect our Members of Parliament to be role models and inspirations for our young folk.
A thorough government investigation???
Since no Shalampaxian would do a thorough job of anything, I assume you had an independent auditor imported to perform this task. What I want to know is how was the auditor cooked after the investigation was complete? Given the raging winds, I assume we can rule out a festive bar-b-que.
@David: Yes, well, since all Shalampaxians like to brag about their fraudulent activity, in this case a thorough investigation involved asking Brokentoaster how much he ripped the government off for.
You’re right about the lack of a festive barbecue. We rarely experience a long enough calm to cook anything outside.