Apathy Club Head
I’ve harassed my usual sources, but the people in a position to know aren’t willing to confirm or deny the dollop of gossip I’m about to dish out. In fact, they all said they didn’t care to talk to me. So, judge the veracity of what I’m about to say accordingly.
The scuttlebutt is that, after being vacant for as long as anyone can remember, someone finally stepped forward to fill the position of the president of the Apathy Alliance, a club for people who couldn’t care less. The rumor mill has not coughed up a name, but the candidate was apparently immediately fired for giving enough of a damn to step forward.
Apathy is a fickle mistress.
So is scuttlebutt but that is a story for another day.
@David: Maybe so, but the truth is, I don’t care. I’d join the Apathy Alliance if it weren’t for the fact that I’m completely disinterested in clubs of any sort.
Since stepping forward then stepping backward (Ahem, not fired!), am I still eligible for the breast implant offer? Not that I really care.
@MadMadMargo: Before we decide if you are eligible for the breast implant you would, of course, have to undergo a detailed physical examination to see if your breasts warrant an implant. The person who will do the examination doesn’t have any medical training — he’s just a horny bastard who desperately wants to cop a feel.
@Stoneupnose
I figured as much. Not that I really care.
@MadMadMargo: If you care enough to do so, please email your telephone number to Stoneupnose@shalampax.com and I’ll have my representative arrange for your examination.
Honestly, I couldn’t care less.
@The Mother: That’s the spirit!