Halloween in Shalampax
Last night was Halloween in some parts of the world. As I understand it, on Halloween many people dress up in scary costumes and try to frighten other people.
Readers from outside of Shalampax have asked me if we celebrate Halloween here. The short answer is: No. The long answer is: No, because we consider it to be a superfluous holiday.
What do I mean by “a superfluous holiday?” I can explain that quite easily.
I don’t like to brag, but I’m widely considered to be one of the handsomest dudes in Shalampax. My picture was recently taken and Photoshop was used to smooth out some of my more unattractive features, remove some of the natural green color in my skin and, in general, make me look more handsome than I am in real-life. The following is the result:
Birdinhand
Keep in mind, as I said, I’m one of the more handsome men here. I don’t think any of the other guys would be willing to have his picture published. So, what do I mean when I say Halloween is “a superfluous holiday?” Need I say more?
Quite the striking appearance you have. Reminds me of the pics they produce at Glamour Shots using airbrushing.
If only you could leave the island, I could envision a great career in the movies. I’m not sure which movies but I’m certain there would be roles for you.
@David: That picture was doctored somewhat to make me look a little less horrific than I do in real-life. So I’m sure producers would love to cast me in horror films. It would save a lot of money on makeup. No thanks.
My but you are a handsome guy. I agree with David, I think you would be the hit of tinsel town.
You actually look a lot like my husband–but you have more hair.
Dude! You are handsome. Love the strong chin, the square jawlinw, and the hair… Does everybody in Shalampax have cool hair like that?
@ann: I think you’re almost right. I think people would hit (hit, not hit on) me in tinsel town.
@Patricia: You and your husband have my sympathies.
@Leeuna: Because of our exceptionally shallow gene pool, there’s not a lot of difference among Shalampaxians. I’m just a little more handsome than the other guys. Oh, we don’t have any barbers, so yes, most guys hair looks like that.