Technology Acquisition
I don’t know if you’ve been reading Stoneupnose’s reports on Openfly’s recent adventures wherein Openfly, by an amazing coincident, stumbled on Marie, the woman who, more than anyone else, is responsible for Shalampax being the great nation it is today. But if you haven’t been reading his columns, you should. They’ve been spellbinding. Or maybe they just put me to sleep. I often find it difficult to tell the difference between spellbinding and sleep-inducing.
If Marie’s importance eludes you then you obviously haven’t done any reading on Shalampax’s history. And if not, why not? How the hell do you think you’ll ever be able to figure us out if you’re not willing to spend a few minutes reading about us at Shalampax’s national Web site?
Sorry, I got off on an tangent there. I mentioned Stoneupnose’s reports because they reminded me of something. Before Marie washed up on our shores we had no technology and no language. Marie didn’t give us technology, but she did teach us English.
Marie was only here for a couple of years and when she left we still had no technology. The story of how, in just two or three decades, despite living on an exceptionally isolated island, we were able to use our newfound knowledge of English to acquire some of the most advanced telecommunications and electrical equipment in the world is a fascinating story.
That is to say, I sort of remember it as being a fascinating story. Unfortunately, I’ve completely forgotten what that story is. I asked a few people here if they could recall it, but their minds were blank. This is not surprising because blanks are their minds’ normal state of affairs.
I also looked through our national archives, which are a few spiral-bound notebooks with handwritten observations inscribed in crayon. Unfortunately, there is nothing in those archives about how we acquired our technology.
Truthfully, that may not be entirely accurate. I think there is nothing in our archives about the story of how we acquired our technology, but most of what’s written in there is illegible. Handwriting is not a strong suit of any Shalampaxians. Actually, few of us have a strong suit of any kind.
That’s a pity because it really was an absolutely amazing story. At least, I seem to remember it being an absolutely amazing story. Maybe. Maybe not. My mind isn’t as sharp as it once was and it never was that sharp.
If anyone remembers that part of our history, please drop me a line. Thanks. Bye.
