Shalampax Speaks

Hey peeps, Openfly has now had her second set of two simultaneous cosmetic surgeries. As you’ll remember, last time she had a nose job and a tummy tuck. This time it was her lips and thighs.

She still requires considerable healing of her surgical bruises and scars, but, according to Openfly, “I’m already starting to see a little bit of symmetry in my body, which was totally lacking prior to the surgeries.” I don’t think she has a clue what the word symmetry means, but she seems to be happy with the results.

Openfly is also moving forward with getting her business going, as is required to qualify for a U.S. investor class visa and, after that, a green card. Openfly’s purchase of the land adjacent to Marie’s hippie-retro commune closed as planned. Crews are already demolishing the buildings that were on the property to make way for her New Age paraphernalia manufacturers’ outlet mall.

The previous owner’s use of the land was a surprise to Openfly, but she could have easily discovered that had she asked any of the residents of Marie’s hippie-retro commune—or done a more thorough inspection of the land and buildings before closing the deal.

All of the plants were gone when Openfly’s crew arrived on the site, but the crew found equipment leftover from a major marijuana grow-op. And the aroma in the buildings was unmistakable. It turns out that the previous owner of the property was the sole supplier of pot to the residents of the commune. Presumably he also sold his wares elsewhere, but that’s unclear.

Many of the retro-hippies asked Openfly to restart the operation so they wouldn’t have to go farther afield to get their pot supplies, but Openfly refused. Much to my surprise, Openfly has decided to live in America totally aboveboard and within the law. She even intends to pay all of her taxes! This just goes to prove that you can take the woman out of Shalampax and you can take Shalampax out of the woman. Go figure.

Between her surgeries and getting her business going, Openfly hasn’t had much time for anything else. As a result, she hasn’t been involved at all in the “reunion” of Marie and MadMadMargo. (Is it appropriate to call it a reunion considering that MadMadMargo was put up for adoption at such a young age that she couldn’t possibly remember Marie?)

Openfly’s unavailability is probably beside the point because Marie and  MadMadMargo had asked Openfly to respect their privacy. The upshot is, Openfly wasn’t able to tell me how MadMadMargo and Marie got along.

I’m very curious about how the reunion went and whether Marie and MadMadMargo plan to visit Shalampax. The only information we have about that is the very brief comment that MadMadMargo left on December 28^th, in which she said she’d tell us more in a day or two—I haven’t heard from her since. I hope she’s OK. With any luck, MadMadMargo is reading this and will drop us a note to fill us in.

Bye for now, peeps.