Government Decisiveness
Manexposinghimself, the Prime Minister of Shalampax, granted me an exclusive interview yesterday. Knowing that these are challenging times in the world, for most of our half-hour together he talked extensively and with great passion about the current batch of television reality shows. That part of our discussion does not bear repeating, but in an off-hand moment he did mention something interesting.
Prime Minister Manexposinghimself made a promise that I think he’s going to keep, which would be totally out of character for him. He promised that, in the future, his government will be much more decisive and will make its decisions much more quickly.
Manexposinghimself explained the rationale behind this new policy by saying, “In the past, we’ve spent a lot of time and money commissioning outsiders to extensively research and analyze data that helped us to make effective decisions. We would have hired Shalampaxians to do the job but, well, have you ever tried to get a Shalampaxian to do anything useful? You can’t find anyone outside of our spam and cult religion businesses who is willing to lift a finger, and those companies are running at full tilt.
“In the future, we’ll make government decisions much more quickly, without waiting for the reports. After we’ve gained more experience at making uniformed decisions, we will be able to stop commissioning the research because what’s the use of data and information when your mind is already made up? This will save Shalampax a fortune.”
You’ve got to hand it to Manexposinghimself. He’s got Shalampax’s interests at heart. I wonder what he’s up to.



















