Shalampax Speaks

The Shalampax coconut industry, consisting of one company, was devastated yesterday. A gale that blew through here carried off all of our coconuts, which were almost ripe. (A meteorological note: Although off the scale in terms of wind strength, the gale affected a circular area with a radius of only about 75 miles. The circle was perfectly centered on Shalampax. The surprising part is, that’s not a very rare occurrence.)

In the past, coconuts have typically contributed somewhat below one percent of Shalampax’s GDP. This year it will be zero.

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In line with other countries around the globe, the Government of Shalampax today announced a major fiscal stimulus program designed to stem the worldwide economic slowdown. Beginning next week, Prime Minister Manexposinghimself and his entire cabinet will initiate sizeable projects that will lavishly renovate and redecorate their apartments at government expense.

Due to stipulations in his divorce settlements, the apartments of Manexposinghimself’s fourteen ex-wives will also be refurbished to a similar level of luxury, also at government expense.

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